Usually when couples fight over money, they're actually not fighting about money. It's deeper than that.
Talking Points:
- Fights about money are usually rooted in another issue. It might be differing values, trust or even power.
- Step #1: Write out your personal values by answering the question, “What do I want to spend my money on?”
- Step #2: Create a basic budget together. Make sure it reflects the values you’ve articulated.
- Step #3: Build trust through a commitment to the budget and to transparency with spending.
Discussion:
- Initial reactions to this topic? What jumped out at you?
- What was the last thing you argued about on the topic of money? What was the fight really about?
- Based on Step #1, what are each of your values when it comes to spending money? Are you surprised by your similarities or differences? Explain.
- How have you seen your differing values be a source of conflict in your marriage?
- Why is it valuable to create a budget that reflects both of your values? Why is it important to stay true to the budget?
- How do you both need to improve on earning trust with money? How will you be more transparent moving forward?
- Is there a step you need to take based on today’s topic?
- Is there a step you need to take based on today’s topic?